citylogs | [closed]

[Kaveh has, for the past two weeks, largely been oscillating between a manic hyperfocus and existential despair. It means a forge is completed in record time. So is the number of wine bottles he's drunk his way through.

It's Netzach, is the thing. Not that Netzach did anything, or anything that warrants more admonishment than he's already received. But Kaveh had been involved each time, and thus he can find a dozen things to hold himself accountable for no matter how unrealistic they are.

Kaveh has nightmares, night after night. Alhaitham reminds him, night after night: You underestimate Netzach's conviction to act as if you could have stopped him. There was no way to know Kromer would attack and there's no information that could have made sure you arrived faster. In neither case did your actions cause his harm. In both cases, you mitigated it.

It's a cyclical conversation, guilt. One Alhaitham and Kaveh have spun around for years with no agreement. Kaveh carries too much shame, Alhaitham thinks, but this is especially egregious. Alhaitham attempts to pry it from Kaveh's fingers as gently as he can, night after sleepless night.

Two weeks, he thinks, something needs to give. So he sends a message to Netzach's phone:

How do you feel about stretching your legs? Kaveh's been sulking and would benefit from your company specifically. We have plenty of alcohol and food. Feel free to bring Yesod.

Which is how in this evening there's a knock on the door. There's been a lot of that lately, with Kaveh not needing to hide where he lives and the general trouble afoot. Alhaitham opens the door, for reasons that are thankfully not cutting out livers.] Come in.

[ The latter half of the month has passed without incident, but that only continues an established pattern. Outside of the city's scheduled experiment scenarios, there is more at any given moment that necessitates staying alert — even relatively innocuous things can become anything but innocuous without warning, as this month has made all too clear. Consequently, it's reassuring that Netzach doesn't intend to head out of the apartment unaccompanied, unlike his visit to the gallery. The evening's destination is familiar, too, and its occupants can be trusted.

Perhaps, in that type of environment, much like their own home, it would be possible to place aside the city beyond its walls, at least for a while.

There was no time to prepare anything to bring with them that would match Kaveh's constant generosity, and when the door opens to reveal Alhaitham, Yesod only waits for Netzach to cross the threshold first before following close behind. He gives Alhaitham a nod in thanks. ]

Good evening.

[ Although it sounds like it hasn't been a good evening... And there could be many reasons for that. ]

Is there anything that we should be aware of?

[after some of the talks he's had with kaveh, netzach can read between the lines. he's sulking, alhaitham says, and with everything that's happened lately...

well. he knows what he would be doing, in kaveh's place, and it doesn't sound like he needs to bring a bottle over.

he does, however, bring his ferret; sweetheart pokes his head out of netzach's jacket pocket once they're inside, and netzach idly pets him so he doesn't get too wiggly in the meantime. his once-injured shoulder has been healed enough not to need it kept immobilized anymore, so he seems more or less as he always has been, offering alhaitham a little wave with his free hand.]

Everything good over here?

Everything except for Kaveh. [Alhaitham shuts the door closed behind them.] It seems you've been healing well, Netzach. That's good.

[And nothing else has gone wrong in the interim. Preferably it will stay that way for a while.] You two and your pet are free to get comfortable. Kaveh will fuss about being a good host anyway.

[So might as well let him, once he realizes. He hasn't actually told Kaveh anyone was coming over, but if their voices don't draw him out Alhaitham will collect his possible-already-tipsy beau.]

[ it's in fact the voices that draw kaveh from where he had been pillowed against the counter. in kaveh's defense, the wine had been adequate. not good, not phenomenal, nothing like the smoky second story of lambad's tavern, and nothing like the sweet murmur of a discounted vintage aged in natlan cellars, but it's adequate for the purposes of liquid comfort. kaveh only rouses from it when it becomes apparent that alhaitham isn't, in fact, talking to himself.

he props himself up against the doorframe leading to the living room and stares. for a moment, netzach seems misshapen. it takes a heart-stopping moment to realise that there's a ferret there in his jacket pocket. ]

Oh. [ kaveh says, and rubs his eyes. colour begins to return to his cheeks. ] Oh. It's your ferret. Yesod, Netzach, welcome. I hadn't realised you were going to be here. [ kaveh looks to alhaitham. it's a Look. ] Was I supposed to know you were going to be here?

[ Getting comfortable may be difficult to accomplish, considering the circumstances. Yesod can't help but suspect that guilt has Kaveh in its grip, and when the man himself makes his entrance, the circumstances become all the more concerning. Kaveh looks decidedly unwell. ]

...Greetings, Kaveh. We received Alhaitham's invitation not long ago.

[ Yesod regards Kaveh in the doorway, brows knit, until he glances at Sweetheart peering out of Netzach's pocket. The ferret's head nudges Netzach's palm, as if to greet Kaveh and Alhaitham as well by growing more active, wriggling about.

There are no other surprise guests — Tagliatelle is at home, of course. ]

Yeah. Surprise...?

[he gives kaveh a little grin, fishing the ferret out of his pocket as he comes over to hand kaveh a wiggly little noodle.]

Sweetheart missed you. So did I, but... I couldn't leave him out.

[therapy ferret.]

[Kaveh gives Alhaitham a Look. Alhaitham ignores the Look, as he often does. He offers a shrug.]

You know now, don't you? [But, like, the forewarning.] It's a get together, so I hope you haven't finished off all of the alcohol in the apartment.

[Not that Kaveh needs more. But Kaveh already isn't getting through this night sober, so the rest of them might as well be allowed to indulge as well.]

[ netzach looks at him from across his living room. he looks healthy, and happy. for a moment, kaveh, whose throat has choked up, can't quite breathe. for a moment, he can't quite look at netzach.

sweetheart's little head pokes into the palm of his hand. kaveh holds him carefully, and lets the warmth of his little body seep in. he's small, and furry, and the warm prod of his nose has kaveh carefully peeling open his hand so the little ferret can sniff at him. kaveh closes his eyes.

the stone lodged in his throat, that cold, leaden thing, begins to melt. ]

Of course, I haven't. [ kaveh says. his voice is a little thick, but it is what it is. ] How could I have finished all of it? But if I'd known that Yesod and Netzach were coming, I would have gone out and gotten something better. Sit, sit - [ kaveh cocks his head to the table, and by the end of the sentence, he's relearned how to smile. ] Yesod, Netzach, make yourselves at home. It's the first time you've been here, right? Sorry for the mess - though I don't know why I'm saying sorry, considering all the mess that you see is Alhaitham's. I'll go get the cups and some of the best of whatever that's left. Have either of you eaten yet?

[ Surprising though it may be, the mess hasn't registered. Yesod watches Kaveh and Netzach. It seems too long ago that Kaveh asked for another blanket and the two of them stayed with Netzach between them, too recent that they all dreaded the possibility of the worst, and the echo of the days that followed isn't silenced.

We're well, Kaveh had claimed — but that clearly isn't the case, despite his smile. The fault is mine, he'd repeated.

How much has Kaveh been drinking...? Discernible concern might be interpreted as nothing but disapproval, Yesod knows, and it risks eroding trust, worsening guilt and shame, causing the recipient to feel alone with nowhere to turn. He thinks of returning to cans and bottles scattered across the floor, the glow of Enkephalin in the dark, that abyss of helpless despair — and the relief of Netzach still there, Netzach broaching the subject of those shadows himself, choosing to take precautions of his own will.

Yesod tries to keep his expression from giving away his thoughts, the emotions behind them, at least this time. They have done enough damage lately — both Kaveh and Netzach have treated him with concern, too. ]

...It's good to see you and Alhaitham in person again, Kaveh. That is the purpose of this visit. We've also appreciated your cooking.

[ It isn't a polite lie — the thought and care warrant acknowledgement, and so does the taste — regardless of his own body's revulsion for himself in the aftermath of his carelessness. Kaveh's generosity has meant that he could stay with Netzach and Midnight, that he could keep watch, reducing the need to leave to restock their supplies.

Kaveh and Alhaitham have both prompted their guests to make themselves comfortable, and Yesod moves now, if only to stand beside a seat for Netzach to sit down, in place of a chair to pull out for him. ]

[Kaveh pulls out the alcohol (mostly wine) and appetizers, which is mostly hummus and pita and sliced fresh fruit because he didn't know anyone was coming by and is more than willing to blame it all on Alhaitham why they're underprepared to host. Alhaitham knows this really didn't need the presentation and chose the most guilt-free way to make sure Kaveh didn't make a fuss.

It's Netzach and Yesod. This is enough.

What's also enough: Kaveh's alcohol intake, although Alhaitham knew from the start that trying to convince Kaveh to stop drinking when he's already been drinking was a fool's errand. Thus, he's devised a far more subtle and effective plan of moderating Kaveh.

Stealing his alcohol when he's not looking and drinking it himself.

It's a little sad how easily he gets away with it for the next couple of hours. Alhaitham is certainly drinking too much too quickly even with the food. He knows to pace himself, but once this started it couldn't stop and now he's found himself in a situation of being pleasantly drunk alongside the others, which actually isn't a terrible state of affairs all things considered. His arm is definitely trying to find its way around Kaveh while listening to the conversation. It's probably gotten back around to art for the third time.]

[ There is a threshold that Yesod intends to avoid crossing, though he has come to understand the appeal of spending time with friends like this. That is, while he appreciates the specific company and the notion of contributing to the evening, he is all too aware of his limits by now. Compared to the others, he hasn't had much to drink across the hours passing, but even then, he has lost track of Alhaitham's intervention to mitigate Kaveh's alcohol consumption, and his cheeks are flushed, his thoughts somewhat indistinct and disconnected until he concentrates on pursuing them, with some effort.

Still, it feels less unsettling than he would have expected, at least for the moment — his attention is divided between the conversation and everyone's relative positions and abruptly noticing the movement of Alhaitham's arm. It's quite understandable, of course, as a reflex or a gesture consciously offered to Kaveh.

(Briefly, it reminds him of ~~biceps~~ discussions near the beginning of the month that seem distant and too carefree now.)

Yesod's free hand drifts towards Netzach before he returns to a question recalled. ]

...Ah, by the way, how does "Mehrak" function? I've been curious.

[ Brow furrowed, Yesod studies Alhaitham intently. He aligns his raised hand with Alhaitham's upper arm, thumb and pinky finger extended, the remaining three fingers between them curled into his palm. ]

Netzach corroborated Reno's observations at the time. I agreed to act as an impartial judge.

[netzach is, at this point, in a drunken sprawl wherever he happens to end up. right now, while yesod is examining alhaitham's arm, netzach has draped himself mostly across kaveh but partially across alhaitham, with kaveh sandwiched between them both so as not to disrupt alhaitham's contact with him.]

Oh- what, the biceps thing?

[Yesod is checking out his arm. Alhaitham, shameless on a normal day, lets him. And lets Netzach half-drape on him. And Kaveh.

Alhaitham flexes the arm Yesod is currently feeling up, so he can also witness the muscle contraction.] The push-ups. Was that about my biceps?

[ kaveh, who is still sitting there with his face pillowed into alhaitham's chest, looks up blearily. he's been trying to pull up alhaitham's shirt for the past 10 minutes. he hasn't been successful because he's somehow misplaced his fingers half-way through the process. ]

A biceps competition...? I suppose - that requires some kind of judgment. Judging. [ ... kaveh reaches up to squeeze alhaitham's bicep.

he misses.

netzach's hair is equally nice, though. ]

[Alhaitham, aware that Kaveh has been trying to remove his shirt for the last ten minutes and left him to struggle, has finally decided to actually do something about it. He doesn't really bother dislodging Yesod's hand completely as he reaches for the hem of his shirt and pulls it right off over his head. Probably with a bit of bumping Kaveh with his hand, and then it's just thrown over the back of the divan.]

[ a happy sleepy noise. kaveh pillows his face back onto alhaitham's shoulders,. he pulls out a pen. ]

And what's this about push-ups?

[ At least Yesod's days of judging people for clutter and drinking to excess and so on are behind him, and he has no room to judge anyone now, outside of contests. It's more than a little difficult to reach across the pile of limbs that Netzach and Kaveh make to examine Alhaitham while maintaining contact with Netzach('s legs???), in part because he has to seek purchase for his other hand to prop himself up against something steady. He pauses to consider the sequence of questions, interrupted by Alhaitham's sudden decision to remove his shirt.

Taken aback, he promptly loses his balance, catches hold of Alhaitham's arm, and freezes in place while Kaveh adjusts his position.

It occurs to Yesod to avert his gaze, but it's too late for that. In any case, there must be some logic behind the partial undressing, just as there was behind his own actions. ]

...As I was unaware of the nickname, I sought clarification. Evidently, it should be considered common knowledge. The competition would presumably assess... the correlation between muscle mass and endurance?

Something like that. Reno forgot Alhaitham's name and called him "biceps" while we were talking about it. I think he was making a chart for relationships...?

[ah-- yesod is struggling to balance. netzach helpfully reaches over to take yesod's other wrist and plant it on alhaitham's chest.]

[World cold and hard, but tiddy soft and warm... enjoy that Yesod. They've got a nice firm squish to them.

Alhaitham, warm from the alcohol and three other bodies, lazily tilts his head against Kaveh's as he looks over at Netzach.] The boyfriend chart. I haven't seen it. Yesod mentioned it.

Ah, Reno's chart? I liked the colours he used. I think he's a bit lonely, isn't he? [ says kaveh, the drunken inferences darting from place to place as he begins to scrawl out a new chart on alhaitham's abdomen. ] I think it looked a little like this...

[ red and purple, he thinks? ] But hah! Biceps. That's a good one. I prefer it to the lunatic, really. Did you know that you can tell it's Alhaitham just by looking at the shape of his biceps alone?

[ Since Alhaitham is taking all of it in stride, it seems best to do the same, despite new reasons to perish internally. Yesod also suspects that if he moves too suddenly to let go, he will fall. Thus, he waits to regain his composure and his bearings. (Why did Netzach choose this particular placement for his hand...?)

In the meantime, this serves as a preliminary muscle mass assessment as well. ]

...Yes. It was indeed color-coded. I believe it was... red to represent a reciprocal relationship, purple for a less clearly defined situation, green for friends, and blue for...

[ "Fucking but it's not a thing"... ]

Sexual relations without the expectation of any romantic involvement, I suppose.

[ Here, Yesod is torn between questioning Alhaitham's other nickname and Kaveh's assertion. He focuses on Kaveh then. ]

...The shape...?

[Alhaitham watches Kaveh's blooming chart across his stomach as he listens to Yesod's explanation. Reading it upside down is no problem. It's even color-coded.

Except--he frowns slightly.] That can't be right.

[He lifts his head, squinting as he looks between Yesod and Kaveh. Searching their eyes and the flush of their cheeks.

And when he has an answer, he looks back to Kaveh again.] You're too drunk. You're getting the colors wrong.

[Yes, he has decided it is Kaveh Who Is Wrong.]

Arrival

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finally drags myself in here...

✨

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Partay - threadjack central

the relatively normal conversation topic continuation... for now???

cursed biceps timeskip somehow, closing my eyes

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