Tsuruno "all fired up" Yui (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fanstheflames) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
citylogs2023-10-20 08:45 am
fanstheflames) wrote in citylogs2023-10-20 08:45 am
[OPEN] Residential Halloween Party
WHO: EVERYONE.
WHAT: Resident run Halloween Party, as well as after party!
WHERE: District 2 restaurant, and also around the city.
WHEN: October 22 to October 31
WARNINGS: To be warned in character threads!
The Halloween Party takes place at a restaurant with an open courtyard, a high wall to give some privacy, but the sky above is clearly visible, every door opened wide. Precautions even taken, with cinder blocks by the courtyard's double doors leading in and out, with a blanket and pumpkin on top for decoration, of course.
Your typical Halloween decor covers every inch, inside and out, and even on the outer wall to make clear you've found the right place: fake cobwebs cover the walls, there are glowing orange lanterns strung from the ceiling, dotted every now and then by hanging bats (yes, these are also fake) and there are jack-o-lanterns making all sorts of weird and delightful faces at you on countertops and on top of some of the tables. There’s even a skeleton in one of the corners gesturing to the bar! He’s got a cool top hat! He also has a sign propped up against him that reads PLEASE DRINK RESPONSIBLY.
There’s food! There’s drinks! There’s merriment!
It should be the most inoffensive Halloween Party, by all accounts. And for some--who intend to go to the university's event--it will be. But for those who intend to stay away....
The party has ended! The one at the university is, apparently, going strong for multiple days! But you’ve resisted! You decided to go along with this experimental idea and made it through thus far! But the horrors persist, don’t they?
And maybe they’re a little more stubborn than you are.
WHAT: Resident run Halloween Party, as well as after party!
WHERE: District 2 restaurant, and also around the city.
WHEN: October 22 to October 31
WARNINGS: To be warned in character threads!
FLIERS GO OUT with the announcement of the university's Halloween Party, and the final preparations for the resident Halloween Party are put into motion. Word is put out that they'll start their party on the exact day of the university's, and on that day, fliers are put around today with a location and time, and message.THEY'RE TESTING YOU. STAY AT HOME.
IF YOU WANT TO TEST THEM BACK, COME TO OUR PARTY. SEE WHAT THEY DO.
STAYING BACK IS ALWAYS SAFER.
People will do what people will, and in this place, intentions matter most.
But it's just a little party, right? What's the worst that could happen?
... AT THE PARTY.
The Halloween Party takes place at a restaurant with an open courtyard, a high wall to give some privacy, but the sky above is clearly visible, every door opened wide. Precautions even taken, with cinder blocks by the courtyard's double doors leading in and out, with a blanket and pumpkin on top for decoration, of course.
Your typical Halloween decor covers every inch, inside and out, and even on the outer wall to make clear you've found the right place: fake cobwebs cover the walls, there are glowing orange lanterns strung from the ceiling, dotted every now and then by hanging bats (yes, these are also fake) and there are jack-o-lanterns making all sorts of weird and delightful faces at you on countertops and on top of some of the tables. There’s even a skeleton in one of the corners gesturing to the bar! He’s got a cool top hat! He also has a sign propped up against him that reads PLEASE DRINK RESPONSIBLY.
There’s food! There’s drinks! There’s merriment!
It should be the most inoffensive Halloween Party, by all accounts. And for some--who intend to go to the university's event--it will be. But for those who intend to stay away....
1. COMPULSION. It starts out small: you think about what's happening at the university. Sure, you may wonder what's happening and about the other people there, that's normal, but sometimes, you find your mind drifting: why aren't you there? It would be good to go, wouldn't it? You're not even sure why you wouldn't want to go, and you may even find yourself abruptly bringing it up in the middle of another subject to the person you happen to be talking to. Hey, why don't we go to the university? Don't they have a party going?
But then, you may catch yourself, or need another person to snap you out of it. And then you might become more aware of how insistent the thought is becoming...and how you're talking about what's happening at the university, even while trying to watch out for it.
2. IN COSTUME. You've come in costume--what's a Halloween Party without one? From your zombie outfits to your vampires (um, rude? Call the local vampires), maids to cats, there's nothing too serious nor silly for Halloween. You could even just have something simple for the mood--a pair of ears on, or a pumpkin pin.
Whatever you're wearing, over time you start to feel...let's say in character with your outfit. Are you just feeling giddy from the drink? But small instances start to become more insistent: This isn't just a costume, this is who you are. And maybe a person or encounter can make you snap out of it...
But what will happen before then? And how long will you be your regular you?
3. TRICK OF THE EYE. It's reasonable to be worried. There's an expectation that the city will find some way to screw with this party, but is it just your anxiety making you see things out of the corner of your eyes, or is something playing tricks on you? These visual tricks can continue through the night, either staying as small scares to catch you off-guard, or...
...they can become more than tiny glimpses: where you start to see people, figures science-like in nature, faces that appear to be watching you. People who aren't there when you try to approach them, or are gone when you blink. Or are they there? Is it other residents staring at you? Though they might insist they don't have a clue what you're talking about--or accuse you of doing the same.
4. PARANOIA. Slowly but perhaps inevitably, you feel a prickling on the back of your neck. And you can’t shake the insistent feeling that something terrible will happen if you stay here. But where is that feeling coming from? Did Robby put something in your drink when he handed it to you? Is Tsuruno’s smile concealing something more sinister? Can your hosts really be trusted? They might be throwing you under the bus here. Or maybe they were working for the City all along…
In that case, maybe it’s best to distance yourself as quickly as possible?
5. HAUNTINGS. It’s a nice party, you’re enjoying yourself, maybe bobbing for apples, maybe making out with that cute vampire in the corner (contain yourself, Midnight). Or you could be a killjoy and you’re just waiting to see what will go wrong, in which case you might be able to duck the caramel apple that comes soaring at you. Or the plate. Or a chair? While you won’t be able to pick up on anything supernatural beyond a chills and the distinct feeling that Someone is watching you…
It’s a little hard to ignore when things keep getting tossed at you with increasing regularity with no real source behind it. And you may find yourself being tossed–
Right out of the party. Wow, maybe the university party has bouncers that are a little more polite.
But then, you may catch yourself, or need another person to snap you out of it. And then you might become more aware of how insistent the thought is becoming...and how you're talking about what's happening at the university, even while trying to watch out for it.
2. IN COSTUME. You've come in costume--what's a Halloween Party without one? From your zombie outfits to your vampires (um, rude? Call the local vampires), maids to cats, there's nothing too serious nor silly for Halloween. You could even just have something simple for the mood--a pair of ears on, or a pumpkin pin.
Whatever you're wearing, over time you start to feel...let's say in character with your outfit. Are you just feeling giddy from the drink? But small instances start to become more insistent: This isn't just a costume, this is who you are. And maybe a person or encounter can make you snap out of it...
But what will happen before then? And how long will you be your regular you?
3. TRICK OF THE EYE. It's reasonable to be worried. There's an expectation that the city will find some way to screw with this party, but is it just your anxiety making you see things out of the corner of your eyes, or is something playing tricks on you? These visual tricks can continue through the night, either staying as small scares to catch you off-guard, or...
...they can become more than tiny glimpses: where you start to see people, figures science-like in nature, faces that appear to be watching you. People who aren't there when you try to approach them, or are gone when you blink. Or are they there? Is it other residents staring at you? Though they might insist they don't have a clue what you're talking about--or accuse you of doing the same.
4. PARANOIA. Slowly but perhaps inevitably, you feel a prickling on the back of your neck. And you can’t shake the insistent feeling that something terrible will happen if you stay here. But where is that feeling coming from? Did Robby put something in your drink when he handed it to you? Is Tsuruno’s smile concealing something more sinister? Can your hosts really be trusted? They might be throwing you under the bus here. Or maybe they were working for the City all along…
In that case, maybe it’s best to distance yourself as quickly as possible?
5. HAUNTINGS. It’s a nice party, you’re enjoying yourself, maybe bobbing for apples, maybe making out with that cute vampire in the corner (contain yourself, Midnight). Or you could be a killjoy and you’re just waiting to see what will go wrong, in which case you might be able to duck the caramel apple that comes soaring at you. Or the plate. Or a chair? While you won’t be able to pick up on anything supernatural beyond a chills and the distinct feeling that Someone is watching you…
It’s a little hard to ignore when things keep getting tossed at you with increasing regularity with no real source behind it. And you may find yourself being tossed–
Right out of the party. Wow, maybe the university party has bouncers that are a little more polite.
... IN THE CITY.
The party has ended! The one at the university is, apparently, going strong for multiple days! But you’ve resisted! You decided to go along with this experimental idea and made it through thus far! But the horrors persist, don’t they?
And maybe they’re a little more stubborn than you are.
1. COMPULSION. You went to the party, or you never did--it doesn't matter. For some reason, you can’t get the thought of going to the university party out of your head. And maybe it’s light, at first. Just a passing thought. Or maybe you find yourself unconsciously heading in the direction of the university, or even start having it come up in conversation.
“Hey how are you” totally sounds like “Halloween party at the university”, right? Doesn’t this actually sound like a good idea, the more you think about it?
2. DISORIENTATION. Something feels… off. You only paused for a few seconds, so why has it been an hour? Despite your best efforts, your focus keeps slipping away in increasing intervals, and the more frequently this happens, the more time you feel like you’ve lost, even if that person you’re with helps you fill in the blanks. And if no one’s there to assist? Well, you felt like getting lost today, surely!
3. TRICKS. As the day drags on, you may find yourself turning on your heel at the sound of… a familiar voice or a bit of nostalgic conversation, the joyful sounds of a party. But no matter which direction you hear it from, when you turn around, there’s no one there.
It gets worse. You start to see things, flickering across your line of vision, suddenly there. But it’s nothing friendly or warmly nostalgic. They’re flashes of your worst fears, more and more insistent, and these will only increase in frequency the longer you hold off on going to the university party. Is it really worth being stubborn over? This could all be resolved so very quickly.
4. IN COSTUME. If you were at the party, you find it difficult or even undesirable to take off the costume. If you weren’t at the party, you’ll still find yourself dressing up to get into the Halloween spirit, which maybe you didn’t actually give a damn about before? Such is the magic of the holidays.
But it’s more than just a different outfit. You’re starting to acquire characteristics of that outfit. And maybe you can feel those fake vampire fangs digging into your lip with increasing sharpness. Wow, that face paint for your zombie costume is starting to look alarmingly legit! That growl that just came out of your throat might have been wolfish and convincing, but surely you’re not actually turning into a wolf–right?
Don’t worry, it’s not actually real. But you should really go check out the university! Haven’t you been through enough?
“Hey how are you” totally sounds like “Halloween party at the university”, right? Doesn’t this actually sound like a good idea, the more you think about it?
2. DISORIENTATION. Something feels… off. You only paused for a few seconds, so why has it been an hour? Despite your best efforts, your focus keeps slipping away in increasing intervals, and the more frequently this happens, the more time you feel like you’ve lost, even if that person you’re with helps you fill in the blanks. And if no one’s there to assist? Well, you felt like getting lost today, surely!
3. TRICKS. As the day drags on, you may find yourself turning on your heel at the sound of… a familiar voice or a bit of nostalgic conversation, the joyful sounds of a party. But no matter which direction you hear it from, when you turn around, there’s no one there.
It gets worse. You start to see things, flickering across your line of vision, suddenly there. But it’s nothing friendly or warmly nostalgic. They’re flashes of your worst fears, more and more insistent, and these will only increase in frequency the longer you hold off on going to the university party. Is it really worth being stubborn over? This could all be resolved so very quickly.
4. IN COSTUME. If you were at the party, you find it difficult or even undesirable to take off the costume. If you weren’t at the party, you’ll still find yourself dressing up to get into the Halloween spirit, which maybe you didn’t actually give a damn about before? Such is the magic of the holidays.
But it’s more than just a different outfit. You’re starting to acquire characteristics of that outfit. And maybe you can feel those fake vampire fangs digging into your lip with increasing sharpness. Wow, that face paint for your zombie costume is starting to look alarmingly legit! That growl that just came out of your throat might have been wolfish and convincing, but surely you’re not actually turning into a wolf–right?
Don’t worry, it’s not actually real. But you should really go check out the university! Haven’t you been through enough?
a
It's also not too surprising to see him here. It seems like the sort of thing Kim would support, even if Daniel's own angle on beiong here has a little more to do with looking out for the kids than necessarily rebellion in itself.
And when he approaches the other and hears what Kim is saying, a smile appears on Daniel's lips. Is he nervous about how this entire thing might turn out? Sure, but.. at least there's good company for now. It might help him forget about his worries for a few moments. ]
Those two don't do anything halfway. [ There's some pride in the words that Daniel couldn't hide, even if he'd try. ] This entire plan was wild enough by itself, wasn't it?
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It was. Just like a couple of kids to think of it, too. If we can't speak with the people in charge, we can at least convey our dissatisfaction in a different way. I just hope it doesn't backfire on us.
[ He takes a sip of his drink -- a non-alcoholic, effervescent thing. ]
Is Tsuruno one of your students as well?
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[ See, it's not that Daniel doesn't think what Kim says before it is important. He does, but it's exactly the reason he's here, and why he's so worried about all of this, and he really doesn't want to think right now about how this could backfire, especially on the kids.
So he's doing the healthy thing of pushing that down to focus on something that's a little easier to talk about. Something that can actually keep the smile up on his face as he speaks up to the other, watching the girl in question from across the room. ]
Not from back home the way Robby is, though. She just asked me to teach her some stuff here, so I have been doing that.
[ See? Kid talk. Much safer. He'd apologize for bothering you with it, Kim, but it's better than getting all depressed and worried about whatever bad thing could happen, right. ]
Between you and me, I'm pretty sure she and Robby are dating, but they're at that age where admitting as much to their teacher is extremely embarrassing, so they haven't done that yet.
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Dating, huh? [ He snorts. ] Trust teenagers to date, even in a place like this.
[ There's no real derision in it. Just age. Age and experience, and the knowledge of how messy break-ups can get -- especially teenaged ones. ]
Good for them. Better than hanging out with the likes of us all day, [ he points out, raising a brow at Daniel. ] At least they're past the age where you'd need to give them the talk. I don't know if any of you would come out of that unscathed.
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On the other hand? He's just glad to see they're doing alright. That they're still finding little moments of happiness where they can, even in a place like this.
.. It's a thought he's drawn out of real quick with what Kim says next, making the man let out a short laugh before he shakes his head. ]
I've already done my time when it comes to that. [ Time for someone else to pick up the slack, if there are younger kids in this place who'd have to be told that.. ] My daughter-- Sam. She looked like she was dying pretty much the entire time.
[ So maybe he's not the most efficient when it comes to that. Sue him. ]
My other kid just told me to hurry it up so he could go back to playing his video games. [ Another shake!! Of his head!! ] I'm not sure if that's better or worse.
[ There's a very slight pause, but then Daniel seems to realise something, looking back at Kim. ]
Ah, sorry if I'm just boring you with these personal stories. [ H-Haha, talking about yourself, what's that? What's being used to that. Daniel wouldn't know. ]
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[ Between the two of them, Harry's the can-opener. Kim doesn't have Harry's remarkable social skills for it or, indeed, much in the way of social skills outside of what he needs to get by in polite society at all. Harry has a supra-natural knack for it, to ask the right questions, apply the right pressure, threaten and cajole, wheedle and charm, a force that sucks you in and makes you want to tell him what he wants to know. Kim would make for a poor police officer indeed if he didn't know his own weakness in that respect.
But he has a different power of his own, albeit not one particularly helpful in most policework. He cannot make people talk, but there's something that encourages it. His expression, closed off as it is, is quietly kind, a gentleness to his small smile, rapt attention in eyes magnified by the thick lens of his glasses and in the near-permanent crease of his brow. It does not make people talk, but it reassures others that whatever they say, he will listen. ]
So you have a daughter and a son. [ Daniel must miss them terribly. Kim does not voice this thought aloud. Daniel is in no need of more reminders. ] They must both be in their teens now, yes? [ His eyes flit to the ring on Daniel's finger, then back to him. ] A handful, at that age, though I imagine having your wife around helps matters.
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Yet Daniel - perhaps typically - doesn't say it right away. Hell, he doesn't want to say it at all.
But he thinks back on a talk he had in this place. With Tsuruno, ironically enough. The way the girl encouraged him to at least talk to a fellow adult about his problems, even if he didn't want to tell the kids about it. And while Daniel did promise her he'd do that, it feels like.. a lot to drop suddenly on someone's shoulders.
Even someone who has so far been as understanding as Kim.
Daniel swallows, and when he speaks, his voice is a little more quiet. Not a full on whisper, but this is definitely something he isn't intending on sharing with more people than just Kim here, apparently. ]
Actually, she-- she took the kids and left. A little while before I ended up here, I mean.
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He had turned his detective brain off in favour of a couple of nice conversations, hadn't he? As Kim thinks about it, more things slip into place. To be caught up in such violence puts a strain in any relationship - Kim has seen more break-ups during his tenure as an officer than he cares to consider; divorcees and bachelors, the lot of them - and consumed with his students, the dojo he runs when he's not labouring at his day job... how much time does that leave him, exactly? How deep do his workaholic tendencies run?
Those are just guesses, of course. Poor sod. Life isn't easy on any of them. ]
I'm sorry to hear that. [ Kim does not willingly engage in emotional conversations as a general rule, a rule that he has found himself breaking time and time again during his time here. He's only human, after all. Besides, if Daniel doesn't tell this to him, who the hell would he talk to about it? Robby? One of the dozen volunteers who look to him as the leader of the welcome diner? Kim doesn't think so.
A dire state of affairs, to have the kids taken away. But not the end of all things. Daniel is still wearing his ring, after all. ]
Was it... because of what you found yourself wrapped up in? [ He gestures at his face. ] The injuries you arrived with. That whole mess.
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She.. already thought for a while I was taking things too far. [ Even his words come slowly. Like they're either carefully chosen, or Daniel just has trouble thinking of what he should say here in the first place.
Or-- maybe both. ]
But the man who gave me those injuries, the one I was trying to stop.. She didn't see what I saw. She didn't believe that he really was-- [ He stops, swallows. ] That he was manipulative. That he was an abuser. That he was hurting kids.
[ Daniel doesn't look at Kim as he speaks, like this is the only way he can get these words out in the first place. He feels like he might lose all courage the moment he actually looks at the other man. ]
He kept goading me at a charity auction my wife was playing an important role at, lying to me and manipulating me into attacking him. And I-- I lost my cool, and I did exactly that. I hardly touched him, but he pretended to fall and get really hurt because of it. Everyone believed him, including my wife.
[ He sucks in a deep breath. ]
So she got mad at me. Took the kids, and.. left to the other side of the country to stay with her mother. Then that man cornered me when I was alone, and.. well, you saw how that ended. He practically left me there for dead. [ Kim did bring up the injuries just now, after all. ] I figure no one even knows what happened to me, or maybe even that I disappeared to this city in the first place.
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He exhales slowly. He likes Daniel. But he can see it from his wife's perspective as well. Fearing that her husband was going to a dark place -- there are few spouses who wouldn't want to separate themselves, their children from all that. Or maybe the right move is to support your spouse, to believe them. Kim doesn't know. He's never been married, and he's never had parents. All he knows is that he is in possession of more of the facts than Daniel's wife was. The evidence that he was facing a very real threat back home had been written all over his face the first time they had met, the ugly bruising crawling up his neck, his voice a mere whisper. ]
God. I'm so sorry. [ Whether Daniel's wife had her points or not isn't important, in the end. She's not the person in front of him now. ] I'm sure people were looking for you, but...
[ There's nothing for them to find. A horrible fate for everyone involved. ]
Abusers can be very charismatic. Very convincing. They can present themselves as upstanding citizens in the public eye. It sounds like this guy did just that. [ He pauses. ] Why the hell did he have it out for you so bad anyway?
cw: mentions of adult-to-child manipulation/abuse
But can he say it? Even to Kim, when he's already opened up to the other guy this far. When Kim has never truly seemed to judge him - other than for his overworking tendency, but at least Daniel can understand the judgement there. But this is something he just doesn't talk about. Something he never talked about with anyone. Not with his teacher, not with his wife, not with any of his kids, biological or karate-adopted. He couldn't even tell Chozen, despite having called the other all the way over to California just to help him out with that specific problem.
The only thing that pushes him over to the edge into doing it is the specific word Kim uses.
Abusers.
Daniel has always hesitated to use that word. It felt too much like it was all his own stupid fault. Blaming both Terry Silver and himself at the same time felt like it couldn't be a situation of abuse. That's-- That's something for other people, and Daniel? Daniel is fine.
He's fine. ]
Because I was his first victim.
[ Maybe he can't echo the word Kim uses, but it's reflected just the slightest bit in the word Daniel opts to use here. His hand lightly trembles. ]
I know what he does to kids, because-- because he did it to me when I was a kid. [ He speaks so quietly too. Still audible enough to Kim, but it's like Daniel is terrified of anyone else at the party picking up on it, nervously glancing around them before going back to staring down at his hands. ] He put me into a situation where I almost died, and then he just.. [ He bites his lip. ] He swooped in, pretending to save me from all that. He lured me in, getting me to only trust him, even when his "training" involved me beating myself into a bruised and bloodied pulp every single day. And I-- I didn't even see it. I just thought he was making me feel special.
[ God, he feels stupid all over again, voicing it out loud right now. The same spiral that constantly plays out in his thoughts, over and over. ]
no subject
Fuck.
[ It's the only thing he can think to say at first but the word, quiet as it is, is certainly heartfelt. He renounces all previous considerate thoughts he had towards Daniel's wife. That it was his own abuser continuing the cycle all over again, but this time making his first - no, no, Daniel didn't have to be the first - watch a new generation of victims. ]
I'm sorry, Daniel. Nobody deserves that. What happened to you then, and what's happening to you now. [ It sounds like a platitude. That's because it is. What else can he say? He can see the way Daniel shrinks in on himself, like he's trying to make him small. As small as he was when this first began.
Kim puts a hand on Daniel's shoulder, looking him directly in the eye even if Daniel won't do the same. ]
If they didn't use such insidious tactics, they wouldn't get away with it as long as they do. They're good at making you feel exceptional. You couldn't have seen it. I'm only sorry that nobody intervened on your behalf the way you've intervened on your kids'.
[ Kim heard stories like this all the time, in juvie. He hated juvie because it was humiliating, infantilizing, being sent to go undercover as some kid as a grown man with years of loyal experience in the RCM. When he expresses his distaste, that's usually what he voices.
But this was the other half. Having to work with, against, alongside countless numbers of juveniles who were stuck spiraling the same drain, very rarely with any meaningful results. How were they to get out of the hole they found themselves in when even the adults around them had no recourse? Oh, the RCM said that they would help, but that did nothing for food, for work, for shelter, for companionship. It was exhausting.
He prefers working with corpses. ]
no subject
And it is hard. Talking about this in general is so hard he never does it, but now he's done it and hears Kim's words, they feel overwhelming in an entirely new way. Something about his pain becoming more real now it's being acknowledged out loud by another person, but there's also something comforting about someone Daniel has as good of an opinion about as Kim practically saying it's not his fault.
(If only it was as easy to believe that, too.)
He breathes in, and it's only then that Daniel finds the courage and energy to turn his head to actually look back at Kim. The first time he tries to meet the other man's gaze, he falters, but then he manages it on the second try, holding it, even if shakily. ]
.. It's why I have to protect the kids.
[ It's not directly addressing most of what Kim just said, because that's a little too hard. Getting words out at all right now feels like a miracle, really.
But he has to say this. Because Kim might get it. ]
Back home-- and here too, since this city is hardly any better. [ It abuses people in its own way, like an insane experiment. ] I can't let this stuff happen to any of them too.
[ It probably explains a thing or two about Daniel, especially given the emotional intensity he speaks those words with. ]
no subject
Kim's not certain if he's that ally. But he might be the closest thing that the poor man's got. He half wishes that he had the ability to call up the man's wife and give her a piece of his mind, tell her to get her ass back over here and deal with the man she married instead of packing up her bags and fleeing from the wreckage that remains of Daniel's mental health. ]
It is why we have to protect the kids, [ he says firmly, giving Daniel a couple solid pats on the back before retracting his hands. ] Don't get me wrong -- the teaching, the parenting, that sort of thing? That's on you. But unlike your situation back home, we are all aware of the dangers this place poses. This is neither a battle you can fight alone, nor one that you should fight alone.
[ Daniel is just a man. He's probably pretty good at self-defense. But here, among vampires and warriors, among time travelers and exorcists and immortals, being pretty good at self-defense doesn't count for a hell of a lot. Kim can't say that his situation is much better, all things considered, but he and Harry were just two guys who were pretty good at self-defense too, and they handled a goddamn mercenary tribunal.
Well, for a given value of handled. Harry got shot and Kim got a concussion and has been plagued with some fairly distressing nightmares from that point on, but that's neither here nor there. ]
This is not your sole responsibility to carry. We're all concerned about the kids here. And we'll all do our part. Why do you think I'm here? I'll give you a hint: it's not because I like parties.
[ Kim doesn't personally believe that will do much to protect the kids, in all honesty. They can hardly protect themselves. But he's hardly going to say that to Daniel; he's only hanging on by a thread as it is. ]
no subject
But Daniel doesn't protest out loud. He just continues to listen to Kim, his hands nervously fiddling with the wedding ring he's still wearing as he listens.
And even when Kim finished, Daniel is quiet for a moment. He sucks in a breath, then breathes out. His gaze glides over towards the rest of the room, looking at the kids at the party, his gaze ending up on Robby and lingering there for a moment.
Then it returns to the other man. ]
Thanks, Kim. [ His words are quiet, perhaps to not let anyone else overhear this, and Daniel visibly straightens up a little bit. Clearly he's not feeling better in an instant, but maybe he's realising a little bit more again where they are, and how little he wants any of the kids to see this, let alone hear about this. ] I know you're right, I just-- I have a hard time actually letting it get through to me.
[ For obvious reasons, given all the things he just said. But at least Daniel can admit to the fact that it's just his brain working in awful ways due to unprocessed trauma, and that he's aware of it. ]
.. sorry for unloading all of this on you. I know it's-- it's a lot. I usually just don't talk about it.
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[ He could have. People in dire straits often do. It comes with the emotional, existential crisis of it all. And for whatever weighed upon people before they arrived, this city only ever exacerbates it. The trauma it puts them through, over and over again, as though interested in only their emotional devastation isn't the worst part, Kim thinks. It's the silence, the uncertainty, the empty streets and pointless days, ripped from everything that makes life worth living.
Except, for Daniel, his student. The student for which half of his issues revolve around in the first place, thrust into dangerous situation after dangerous situation. It's not an ideal situation, Kim thinks. Even looking at Daniel now, drawn and tense and worried, he wonders when the snap will come. Maybe it won't. Talking can be like an earthquake; it lets everything out in fits and bursts and tremors so that you're not stuck dealing with the big one. ]
You needed to tell another adult, anyway. And it will take more than this to shake me. [ In a way, Kim is the perfect choice to confide in. He'll treat things with the gravity that they deserve, yes, but he won't feel shocked by anything, won't be left floundering. His gaze flits over to where the kids are congregating, as though they're not nervous about being here in the first place. ] Have you spoken to anyone else about any of this?
[ He doesn't just mean his past, the abuse, the recent beating; he means his concern for the kids too. But Daniel will take it as he will. ]
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No. This-- It's the first time. [ It feels a little pathetic, admitting as much. But after having been honest about everything else with Kim, he might as well admit this too. That he didn't talk about it with anyone, couldn't talk about it with anyone. It might make his wife's reaction a little more understandable again, given that she has no idea about this.
That no one did.
(Daniel is clearly taking Kim's question as 'any of this' relating to his very messy trauma.) ]
I tried telling one person the gist of it, and it-- [ The man almost looks physically pained for a moment as he seems to recall something. ] It didn't go well. So I didn't bother anymore after that.
[ Except it inevitably had to spill out again at some point, huh. Maybe Daniel was already like a bucket overflowing, and this city was the drop that made it all spill right in front of Kim.
At least it's true that Kim is the perfect candidate for it. Not as easily fazed as some, another responsible adult, and also someone Daniel knows will actually keep this all a secret without him even having to bother to ask the other man to do so.
Daniel inhales, tries to look a little calmer once more, just in case people look in their direction. ]
I've told some people here that I'm worried about the kids in this place, and asked some to look out for Robby, just in case, but.. I assume they just figured I'm a concerned parent.
[ Which-- to be fair, isn't wrong.
It's just that most people don't realise just how deep the layers of trauma underneath that go. ]
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Which is fair enough. And is how Kim himself prefers things. Aside from the stupid little orphanage chats he'd been forced to have with a few people, nobody here knows much about him beyond the fact that he's a cop, he's older than them, and that he's very tired of all of this nonsense. It's how he prefers things from others too, most of the time. Still. The fact that he presumably hasn't even told his wife is... alarming.
He'd say that it's that toxic macho attitude that so frequently keeps his fellow cops from voicing it when they're in serious need, but considering the way Daniel's twisted himself in knots, it's probably got more to do with the way he's decided it's all his own fault. ]
Mmh. It's tough if it doesn't go well the first time. I can see that. [ Does this count as going well? Kim would like to think so. ] Nobody needs to know any more than the fact that you're a concerned parent, to be fair. The whys and the hows -- they're nobody's business. Not even mine. [ He looks out to where the kids are milling about, cups from the punch bowl in hand. ]
...Robby might know more than he lets on, though. Kids can be perceptive like that.
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Not that Daniel is thinking about that. It's instead the last part of what Kim says that sticks out in his mind - and of course it's that, given how much time Daniel spends thinking about the kids. Especially Robby. ]
.. he knows that man is bad news. [ And that he was the one who hurt Daniel right before he showed up here.. mostly because it's not like Daniel really had much of a choice but to explain his injuries to Robby when they had been so obvious, especially back when he couldn't even speak due to them. No way he could avoid a kid questioning him about that. ] That's all I need him to know. That he has to stay away from him at all costs.
[ It makes Daniel think of something, suddenly realising it. It feels like such a small threat in the face of everything this city has put them through already, but-- it still is a worry, even if it's a relatively smaller one in the face of this place making them hallucinate murder in the middle of a mall.
It tears his gaze away from the kids, moving it over towards Kim. ]
You should too, if he ever shows up here. [ Not that Daniel doesn't think Kim is a perfectly capable person, but-- no one should have to deal with that guy. Especially if he'd try to manipulate people here too. ] His name is Terry Silver. A tall guy, older than us, with grey hair that's most likely pulled back into a small ponytail. [ Daniel swallows thickly, mostly at the very thought of Terry Silver being thrown on top of all his current problems in the city. ] You never know what kind of trash this city might decide to draw in.
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Saying that out loud now would be unnecessary, and cruel besides. ]
Mmh. I'll take that under advisement. And you take your own advice as well, mind. No need to go after him without back-up. [ He shrugs. ] I'd rather it not come to that, but we could take him.
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There's definitely some surprise in Daniel's eyes, even if it's muted by the heaviness that seems to have come over him when discussing this entire topic in general. When he speaks up, it's with a bit of difficulty. ]
You don't have to involve yourself with my trouble.
[ It doesn't sound like he's pushing Kim away, exactly. There's nothing angry, no 'stay out of my business.'
If anything, it just sounds worried. Even if Kim is capable, the situation back home has practically elevated Terry Silver from ordinary terrible human to absolute boogeyman in Daniel's eyes. It feels like no one could handle that man. And the last thing Daniel can do is let yet another person he cares about suffer at that man's hands. ]
I don't want you to get hurt.
[ Maybe it's a little too openly expressing of feelings, but then again-- these seem to spill out far more easily than anything before has. Like it's instinctive for Daniel to think this. ]
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[ And if it were only Daniel's trouble? If he was the only one endangered? Kim would get involved anyway. He likes Daniel. He doesn't want to see the man hurt. He hadn't known him when they had first met, Daniel trundling along with a chipper expression as though he hadn't gotten hit in the windpipe hard enough to cause permanent damage, and so did not have the appropriate emotional reaction to it.
These days, he'd rather not see him so injured again. He slides his thumb over the side of the glass, his trimmed nail collecting condensation. ]
And while no sane person can promise they won't get hurt, I can at least tell you that it is unlikely it would end as bad as all that. It'd be at least two against one, though I wager that if others knew, he would find himself far more outnumbered than that. [ Daniel is well-liked. Why wouldn't he be? He's a personable chap, normal and down-to-earth. He's the sort of person that people like. ]
Besides, I'm not too bad in a fight. I got out of one of my own just before coming here, just like you. And just like you, I survived it.
[ Against people that Kim thinks must be far, far worse than Terry Silver. Not because he undervalues the sort of trauma Daniel has suffered at his hands, but because of the utter depravity of the people he had faced. The things that Krenel had told him... he won't forget it anytime soon. ]
So. We'll just keep on doing that.
[ Surviving. ]