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The City ([personal profile] citycenter) wrote in [community profile] citylogs2023-09-19 09:00 pm

EVENT: The Nights Were Humid, Still. (September 2023)





THE NIGHTS WERE HUMID, STILL.

WE WERE DREAMING, WAITING FOR NIGHT.
» THE PARK — INTRODUCTORY NOTES
When District 3 opens up, subtle and silent at first, the most noticeable area is the large park. A mixture of open picnic fields and heavily wooded trails, the park offers an escape from the cityscapes for those who seek an oasis amongst nature. Benches and light posts dot the twisting paths, offering a moment's rest to anyone traversing the park for a leisurely stroll or running for… exercise. Unlike its smaller cousin to the south, this park is devoid of statues or monuments, instead more of a tribute to nature and the pursuit of its company. There are, however, several small playgrounds spread around the outer edges for anyone who seeks some playtime with their inner child.

Speaking of your inner child, should you venture to the southern half of the park, you'll find a small carnival that appears to be abandoned. The rides and stalls all appear to be in decent condition despite lying still and silent; if you choose to hop the fence, you'll find that the cables running haphazardly over the grass are connected but powerless. No amount of effort to turn on the rides nor break into the games will prove fruitful, but the park at large has posters stapled to trees here and there advertising the opening of the fun fair very, very soon.


For those who are brave enough to leave the paved walkways to venture deeper into nature, you may find hidden gems—a quiet pond covered in lilypads with a small dock to sit on and dip your feet into the green waters; a romantic pair of swings atop a small knoll overlooking a creek; a shortcut through the trees where even your footsteps are muted by the leaves and dappled sunlight barely reaches your face through the trees above. Here and there you'll find the woods open up to a secluded meadow where the grass is tall and the wildflowers grow thick.

You may also find yourself imagining things just out of reach, like shadowy figures darting from bush to bush, predatory in nature. The phantom call of a crow may echo through the forest's canopy though, like the rest of the city, there is no wildlife to be seen nor heard otherwise. Was that the shout of a woman in the distance, or the cry of a fox? The longer time stretches on, the harder you'll find it is to make your way back out of the treeline, and the trees stretch far above to block out any hope of navigating back to the familiar buildings of the surrounding city. You might want to call for help—if you get find service for your device, that is.



The new park is a permanent location that is open to residents 24/7 as there are no fences nor gates. It's larger than the one new City Hall and has more potential for exploring as well as different features from its cousin. For those that are familiar, it will evoke thoughts of New York's Central Park with its mixture of open areas contrasting with thick woods. Paved walkways, freshwater ponds, picnic areas, and a couple of playgrounds can all be found throughout the park. Along with these, residents may stumble upon other natural and man-made areas such as rocky outcrops, unmarked trails, bicycle paths, fountains, and other things typically found in large urban parks—minus the wildlife. It can be a romantic setting as easily as it can be a horrific one depending on the time of day as well as the company that you keep.

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THEN THE HEAT BROKE, THE NIGHT WAS CLEAR.
» THE FAIR — RIDES & ATTRACTIONS
At 6:00 PM City time on September 19th, the numerous light bulbs of the fun fair burst into blinding color simultaneously, lighting up the darkening sky as loud carnival music slowly churns to life from unseen speakers. The rides all spring into motion, operating on a strict schedule that will allow carnival-goers the time to get on the ride as well as stumble back off after they've had their fun. No one is running the rides that you can see, though they all have the typical podium with an array of buttons that could be used to start and stop the machinery that creaks and groans with age. If you'd like to see what it's like working as a rider operator, you're more than welcome—just make sure you're not making everyone sick.

Due to the fair's small size, the rides are all fairly tame in size and speed. There's a merry-go-round with brightly painted horses to ride along with a handful of mermaids, sculpted hair permanently billowing in the wind. One section at the edge is dedicated to a massive stationary head, evocative of a ventriloquist's dummy, with its mouth gaping open for riders to sit inside, perched on the tongue-shaped bench. For the braver riders, a few other unnerving steeds await, such as a lion with blood dripping from its teeth and claws, a zebra with eight legs, an uncomfortably hairy tarantula, and a gray-skinned creature with its eyeless head split open into a massive mess of razor-sharp teeth. Though the merry-go-round spins at a leisurely pace, staying on if for too long is likely to induce a strange sense of dizziness even after disembarking and attempting to walk it off. The repetitive groan of the pipe organ rings in your ears, hardly helping your disorientation at all though you seek a quiet place to recuperate.

Further along in the fair is a low building comprised of little more than a laminate floor, metal grating roof, and bright red railing that encloses all sides. Strewn about inside are bumper cars, big enough for two if you want to squish in together with a friend, but lacking seatbelts. As you run to find a car you like, you can hear the electricity begin to hum through the roof and spark with the bent antennae of each car as their motors awaken. Loud rock music drowns out the sound of squealing wheels as the drivers begin the arduous task of steering the bumper cars into each other. It's all fun and games at first, but it's easy for a little competition to turn into a grudge match.

The last ride looks like a large metal bowl with steep sides painted dark blue and covered with stars, plantes, galaxies, and a comically simplistic spaceship. The archway standing just in front of the ride's entrance calls it "THE GRAVI-ATOR" with a disclaimer in small print about holding on tightly to personal belongings once on the ride. Stepping into the door cut out in one side, you'll find there are no straps nor seats—everyone should find themselves a comfortable place to lean, preferably in one of the spots that has padding on the walls, because soon the ride will begin to spin and everyone will be pinned down by centrifugal force.


Though they may not be as thrilling as the mechanical rides, there are a few tamer attractions for those seeking a break from the bright lights and loud sounds of the carnival. A hall of mirrors stands to one side of the area, a gaping clown mouth serving as the entrance to the dark building. The laughter and screams from outside are quickly muffled as atmospheric music plays lowly while you try to navigate through a maze of mirrors, many of which distort your appearance. You may see flashes of people that you don't remember seeing come inside, oddly shaped and shadowy where the corners of two mirrors meet. Did you feel someone brush up against you? No, impossible in such tight corridors, but you should probably hurry along to the exit.

There is also, of course, a tunnel of love, though it is a cheap imitation of one. Rather than sitting in a romantic gondola, those interested in going through will do so on foot—a rather daunting task considering that you'll be in the dark once you walk through the heart-shaped door and through the musty red curtains. Still, there's enough time to steal a kiss, or grasp blindly for a hand to hold if you're scared of the dark. Has your lover always had such cold, rough hands? It might be soothing in the muggy warmth you find inside, or maybe it's reason enough to find the way out on your own.



Located in the southern half of the large park is a small fun fair that will open to the public the evening of September 19 with operating hours from 6:00 PM to 11:00 PM City time. Before opening, none of the rides or games will be operational; however, there will be fliers advertising its opening all around the city on billboards and telephone poles, and adventurous characters are able to hop the fence and explore if they so desire. However, they will not be able to turn on any of the rides or games, and will not be able to break into the rides or booths under any circumstances.

Upon opening, there will be a number of rides running themselves on a schedule that allows people time to get on, have some fun, and then get back off again. Though there's something unsettling about the music they play, or maybe how shaky they feel, there's no apparent danger anywhere. Residents are encouraged to enjoy themselves with a group of friends, or maybe a date, and experience all that the fun fair has to offer! The fair will not be open forever, though; its gates will close permanently at 11:00 PM on September 30 and all traces will disappear that night to leave a large, open field behind in the park.

This is a good, ol' fashioned carnival designed to bring together groups of people for thrills and fun. Though there are no overt game mechanics at play, we encourage everyone to get creative and add their own flair to this month's event. If you have any questions about player plots you'd like to run, please revisit the Events & Interactions section of the F.A.Q. and drop us a comment on the mod contact for any additional questions.

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IT SEEMED AN HONOR TO HAVE A MOUTH.
» THE FUN — GAMES & FOOD
The majority of the fair is occupied by stalls full of fair games, their walls and awnings decorated in various themes to match. The shooting gallery is a scene from the American West, cowboys astride horses with a background of cacti and orange rocky mesas. The targets themselves are a variety of desert animals: vultures flying from the roof, lizards skittering along the ground, and coyotes chasing rabbits throughout the middle. A handful of rifles are waiting along the half wall in front, chained and bolted to the wooden surface to keep them from getting carried off, and an array of hats hang above them as prizes displayed for winners. There are the typical cowboy hats, then some pink and green ones, some multi-colored jester hats, and a few that look like uncomfortably realistic rubber masks of faces twisted into horrifying expressions.

The next stall over is as different as can be imagined with psychedelic rainbows, glow-in-the-dark smiley faces, and paint splotches covering all surfaces. Inside is a grid of brightly colored balloons that rain silver glitter once they're popped. Cups of plastic darts lie in wait for those who wish to try their luck to pop five balloons in a row, though the observant will notice there are only four darts per cup. The sides are lined with prizes ranging from sticky fingers, slide whistles, and bouncy balls to an assortment of blow-up weapons such swords, hammers, maces, and frying pans.

Another quintessential carnival game is ring toss, set up in an extra large stall with three open sides for groups to play together if they wish. The bottles are all uniform in size, shape, and their clear color, but if you get a good look at a few, some appear to have items floating inside of them, suspended in glowing liquid. Above, massive stuffed animals hang from every possible section of the ceiling. None of them look quite right, though, such as the smiling bear with an extra row of teeth or the goose with two heads at the end of one floppy neck. The dog is pretty cute, but it's missing an arm and a leg in a way that appears intentional, and that cat has its eyes sewn shut.


Of course, no fair would be complete without food. There are plenty of stalls ready to serve, much like the restaurants in the city, where residents are welcome to swing by for some greasy grub. Corn dogs, fries, funnel cake, pizza, shaved ice, and fried junk food are all easy to find around the carnival. Spread amongst the stalls are popcorn machines playing cheerful music, carts with towering racks of bagged cotton candy, and poles planted in the ground with rainbow lollipops and candied apples sprouting from them. In one corner of the fair where the biggest concentration of food stalls can be found, there is an area of tables with umbrellas for anyone to sit and eat. Food at the fair adheres to it's own unique reset cycle and can be found replenished every evening at 6:00PM just in time for opening.



Despite the potential for danger from the shooting gallery and balloon dart games, both are designed to be as harmless as possible—the bullets are rubber, and the darts are made of plastic. While they will still leave a bruise, there shouldn't be risk of blood loss. The shooting gallery guns are chained in place, unable to be stolen. Removing the darts from their stall will result in thiefs walking in a tight circle that always brings them back in hopes the darts will be restored to their rightful place.

Though the food and games are free, the prizes are not—anyone who attempts to steal prizes without winning the games first will find themselves misplacing their items before leaving the carnival. If residents become aware of this phenomenon and try extra hard to focus on not losing their stolen prize, it will nevertheless slip from their hands and be lost—though a keen eye might see it back in its rightful place at the game stall. If you have the right temperament, this could become a game in and of itself!

Additionally, if there are any fair games or foods that have not been explicitly mentioned above, players are welcome to assume they can be found. Nothing as extravagant as a theme park or amusement park will be present as all of the stalls are designed to be mobile—this is a traveling carnival, after all. Similarly, players are welcome to design their own brand of unsettling game prizes as long as none of them can be used as an actual weapon or to otherwise harm fellow fair-goers.

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WILDCARD.
The city is by no means small, and there are plenty of things for you to see. There's no rush in exploring, so feel free to take your time looking around and peering into various nooks and crannies and alleyways—and don't worry, you're not very likely to find anything peering back.



If none of the above prompts appeal, feel free to check out the Locations and Maps pages and write your own freestyle prompt using one or many of the available locations.

This month's event headers come from "Midsummer" by Louise Gluck.

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kampfgeist: (thinking | hol up wait a minute)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-10-07 05:57 pm (UTC)(link)
It was real bonding. [ actually, it wasn't much of anything until the hijinks started, just normal conversation as they drifted higher above the tops of the trees. but that's less funny for purposes of the story.

heine watches the carriage keep moving, passing the zenith of its rotation and coming back down the other side. whether he or kaveh will be the one to hit stop remains to be seen. ]


Badou? [ what does kaveh Know. there's almost no chance badou told him about the fight they had two days ago, but the timing of the question is still suspect, and heine slides a vaguely inquisitive glance kaveh's way. ] Not today. He'll be here tomorrow though, Don Quixote invited us.

...Why?
fussiest: (pic#16494291)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-10-23 12:39 am (UTC)(link)
[ the wheel looms. kaveh reads the scant instructions. and then, he presses the button. above them, the metal groans into motion. the creak of its arms bring the carriages up and above, the circular grind of the unending samsara churning towards its destined location. kaveh looks. the car that ought to have the broken door should be somewhere near the apex. through the window of the little room, it's difficult to see, but kaveh would rather be here than miss the timing for the button and force them both to wait for another entire revolution.

he puts down his tote bag. his tools clink.
]

Hm? Oh, no. [ kaveh says, and takes out a large wrench, ] I was just thinking that the two of you would've explored together. I came with Alhaitham at some point to take a look at the smaller machinery in the individual stalls. I've been thinking of stripping them down for parts, and I know Badou's good with this sort of thing, so I wanted to know his opinion if he had any. Tomorrow, you say?
kampfgeist: (sigh | what a headache)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-10-24 06:01 am (UTC)(link)
[ it's almost funny, how casually kaveh cuts heine's throat with his words. it would be funny if it didn't hurt like it does. it's an echo of the pain of badou's words, but there's the same sharp edge to them, the same steel in heine's aorta, and he can't breathe for a second, drowning under the immediate surge of shame that overtakes him.

heine goes still, which is fine, because kaveh's not looking. still and silent for a long moment before he forces his hands into his pockets, forces his shoulders back like he's not bending under the weight of all of his own mistakes. ]


Yeah, tomorrow. [ his voice is even. quiet. ] Probably right when it opens.

[ don quixote's invitation had said 6pm. she's very excitable. ]
fussiest: (pic#16494320)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-10-24 06:36 am (UTC)(link)
[ the silence lingers. it lingers in measurable beats. kaveh looks up in time to hear the soft, quiet countenance of heine's voice. he stills.

that isn't like heine, kaveh thinks, not when the subject matter is what it is. kaveh turns to look.
]

Heine? Are you alright?
kampfgeist: (thinking | thousand-yard stare)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-10-24 06:57 am (UTC)(link)
[ and here he was, thinking he had done a commendable job of keeping his voice steady. either heine is losing some of his touch, or kaveh is too perceptive for his own good. a little of column a, a little of column b.

heine sighs. when he shakes his head, it's to banish the ghosts that keep leaving mean little whispers in his mind. ]
Yeah, I'm okay.

[ it's stupid. he doesn't even know how to explain it, the entire fight. the idea of trying to put words to the things he and badou said to each other that night makes his face want to light on fire, that's how intimate it feels. their hands, clasped, in promise and in fear. their foreheads pressed together. badou's thumb along the glitter on heine's cheekbone.

after a second, heine manages, ]
Badou and I got into it about me coming alone. [ that's really the best explanation he can offer. ] Just funny that you said so too.
fussiest: (pic#16494292)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-10-24 08:04 am (UTC)(link)
[ 'i'm okay', heine says, and kaveh thinks - isn't there a study on this, once? a vahumana paper of some repute, indicating that the most said and easiest said of lies is the one of 'i'm okay'. it's heine, however, and the words are soft. they come. kaveh listens. the ferris wheel churns in the sky outside the little window-box as the shape of it takes. an argument, badou and heine. funny that kaveh was the one to say so. it follows, kaveh thinks, that kaveh can put his foot in his mouth no matter how benign the circumstances. this is a thought to continue to revisit later when the guilt can have time to seep once more.

instead, what kaveh is thinking - badou and heine arguing. the best of intentions, the worst of executions, and most importantly, what kaveh knows of the two. heine's standoffish independence and his deep capacity to care. badou's cautious and scalpel-sharp nature, and his equal capacity to care. suddenly, kaveh wonders if nill is alright. she would be; they wouldn't bring her into this, surely, but nill is sensitive and kind.
]

Heine. [ kaveh says, ] I'm sorry. The two of you are close. An argument of that nature could not have been easy.
kampfgeist: (unimpressed | i was expecting more)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-10-24 04:22 pm (UTC)(link)
[ it's not really about kaveh, though. kaveh had no way of knowing that a sentence said offhand would happen to touch a sore spot. heine hadn't said anything to him about the argument, or indeed to anyone: not even to nill, who slept through it entirely. shame keeps him silent, as usual.

before kaveh's even done speaking heine is already shaking his head and waving a hand. he doesn't quite smile, but he does meet kaveh's gaze, and his own expression is something close to reassurance. ]
No, it's okay. We worked it out in the end, we're fine.

[ and that's not even a lie, actually. of course there are other arguments to be had later on, down the line, things that neither of them said that night but which deserve to be spoken aloud. but for now, badou and heine are okay. the fact that the pit of heine's hollowed-out insides is full of self-loathing is no fault of anyone else's. ]

And he was right, anyway. [ he straightens up again, and this time it's accompanied by a very faint smile. ] Don't tell him I said that, he gets insufferable when I admit I was wrong.
fussiest: (pic#16494276)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-10-25 01:43 am (UTC)(link)
[ heine shakes his head. the little smile he gives kaveh is one that kaveh knows to be for kaveh's benefit. it's a gesture of such casual kindness that kaveh feels ashamed for it, that the man who had been hurt and who still hurts is the one who is comforting kaveh. they worked it out in the end, heine says, but kaveh still thinks to the whisper-soft cadence of heine's tone as he had admitted it. heine is still thinking about it, kaveh thinks. of course he would be.

it's badou.

kaveh breathes. he thinks of the little complexities when it comes to those that you choose to let in near. he lets a little laugh drift with it in turn.
]

Oh? Is he the only one who does? [ kaveh tilts his head. he brandishes his tote bag. ] Come, let's go outside. I'll stop the ferris wheel, and you can help me straighten the door before I put it back on. I'll need that strength of yours. Goodness knows my arms aren't fit for the task.
kampfgeist: (thinking | forgot to shade this one)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-10-27 06:16 pm (UTC)(link)
[ and of course kaveh is right, that heine's still thinking about it, and that he's still thinking about it because it's badou. with anyone else it would be water off his back.

but that's neither here nor there, still so many things wrapped up there that heine can't sort through yet. instead he lifts his eyebrows, a transparently false look of innocence, and says, ]
Yeah, of course. I'm totally reasonable and not at all a sore loser when I'm wrong about things.

[ heine will gladly follow wherever kaveh needs him to go. after all, this whole fiasco was at least 50% his fault, so it only makes sense that heine would be the one to put his strength (greater than the average bear!) to good use to fix it.

he does flex, just the once, almost thoughtfully as if regarding his own muscles. heine is all wire, no bulk to him at all. you probably wouldn't know from looking at him what he's capable of. ]
Put me to work, boss.
fussiest: (pic#16494291)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-10-28 07:12 am (UTC)(link)
Certainly not. By the by, how have your Tetris scores been, hm?

[ kaveh says, with a glint of good cheer. the ferris wheel churns. kaveh eyes the procession, and then presses the button. the wheel grinds to a slow and steady halt, gracefully swinging forth its little carriages until the momentum dies. the car with the missing door hovers just above the platform. kaveh double-checks any lingering procedures for an emergency stop, then leads heine out of the box window out into the wider world.

the night air breezes by. kaveh puts down his tote. in his other hand, he gets out a sliding ruler.
]

Well. [ kaveh looks. the pile of metal that once was a door looks back. ] The two of you certainly did a number on this. Start on the other side. Hold it down - let's see if we can bend this back into some semblance of a flat shape. I'm more concerned with the hinges being where they should be, so focus on the left-hand side.

[ then, in the self-same tone: ] You know, I had a fight with Alhaitham about much the same thing.
kampfgeist: (surprise | oh whoa)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-10-31 05:43 pm (UTC)(link)
They're going great, thanks for asking. [ heine's tone is similarly touched by amusement. in truth he hasn't even played tetris since the time at the bank, and his scores certainly have not improved, but then again he doesn't have anyone to play with and it only keeps one occupied for so long.

heine steps outside to make room for kaveh to exit the booth, then follows along behind him, a puppy at heel. ]
Had to, to get it off... [ did they have to get it off to begin with? maybe not. but that's beside the point. heine does as he's told and moves around to the other side of the metal door so he can try working it back into its proper shape.

at least the crime is small enough that heine thinks it'd just be handcuffs for a day, if he and kaveh aren't able to fix the car. ]


—What, about going places? [ he slants a look over at kaveh. ] I have a hard time imagining Alhaitham threatening to put your head through the wall.
fussiest: (pic#16494340)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-11-03 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
[ the metal creaks beneath their hands. normally, a hammer and blow torch and a few hours of hammering would suffice. beneath the fortitude of heine's strength, however, the metal bends. it's not the first time kaveh thinks this: that heine's strength is both a boon and a curse all at once. bruised knuckles and the gentle way which his hands cup themselves around a few lollipops. one for badou, one for nill.

in turn, kaveh's reaching for a pair of pliers in his bag when he starts. kaveh looks. his hands complete the motion, and he applies his pliers to the half-torn hinges. still:
]

Well, no. Alhaitham never makes a threat he doesn't follow through on. [ a careful beat. ] Has Badou ever put your head through a wall?
kampfgeist: (sigh | what a headache)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-11-03 06:20 am (UTC)(link)
[ every time he takes on a task like this, it's a reminder that he's not as strong as he should be—a real mixed bag of emotions, really, given how complicated heine feels about his own capabilities. some days it feels like all of his strength is just a reminder of what he is, and on others, it feels like a blessing that he has any of his strength left at all.

fortunately, this is one of the latter. heine wrestles the metal panel into something as close to flat as he can manage, little by little. ]


No. [ between tugging at the frame, he huffs a breath that could almost be a laugh. ] Never.

[ there were a couple times back home when they kicked each other in the face, but that was then, and this is now!!! ]
fussiest: (pic#16494276)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-11-03 06:37 am (UTC)(link)
[ little by little - and so it goes. the creak of metal, the squeak of joints. kaveh puts his weight into the opposing end of the door so that heine can better use it all as leverage, and the metal bends for it. ]

Oh, well. So there's still time for him to try. [ it's not a real beat of concern per se - the smile kaveh affects is less relief and far more wry amusement at that. because this is heine, and badou, and be it far for kaveh to judge a friendship as deep as theirs - putting someone's head through a wall would have warranted at least a few more questions on the topic.

still,
] But yes, about going places. I was in Badou's shoes, I think, so I'd surmise that I would understand his point of view better. I yelled at Alhaitham over it. And I didn't put him through a wall either, though I very much would have liked to.
kampfgeist: (smirk | you can say that again)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-11-04 01:02 am (UTC)(link)
[ no, there's no concern at all, and of course heine doesn't need it. if badou were ever truly angry enough to put heine through the wall it's almost certain heine would deserve it, but heine doesn't think it'll ever really get to that point—they've argued viciously, sure, threatened violence on each other a hundred different ways, but (and this is the funny part) never has heine actually thought it was enough to end their friendship. ]

That's a little funny, you being upset at Alhaitham about that. [ heine's brows furrow a little as he looks over at kaveh, trying to size him up. ] I see you in the new places just as often as I see him.

[ maybe alhaitham also wants to put kaveh through a wall about it, though. ]
fussiest: (pic#16494253)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-11-04 08:58 am (UTC)(link)
[ heine looks. kaveh looks back, the little quirk of his brow like so. heine searches for something that kaveh isn't certain if he has, and so kaveh holds still to allow him to do so. it really is a funny notion, isn't it, kaveh thinks. the sheer hypocrisy is on display now that heine has mentioned it, but it isn't as if kaveh himself doesn't know. it's the same as he can guess that badou knows this as well.

but you can't help it, the matters of the heart. you can't help to whom you've given it to.
]

Right? It's absurd that I was angry with over it. But in the moment, all I could think of was the image of his lifeless body. Of pain, or of blood, or of him getting into trouble beyond what a mere mortal ought to have stumbled into. Logic will never beat the senses. Your imagination will always be stronger. [ kaveh twists the hinge into the proper shape. he puts his weight into it. the metal groans. ] But more importantly, I suppose I just felt that I wanted him to choose to let me know. At the very minimum, that he cared enough to know that I cared enough to want to know.
kampfgeist: (thinking | not too into that)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-11-04 10:51 pm (UTC)(link)
[ it's not really hypocritical on badou's part—after all, he's only ever made appearances at heine's behest. the bank because heine asked him to go, the mall because heine took nill and put them both in danger. the fair because don asked, and because heine had already gone and found out it wasn't dangerous, which was what prompted the fight to begin with.

he wonders about the rest of it, though. heine has for so long thought of himself as largely expendable, or at the very least has considered it his obligation to put his relative indestructibility to good use. what good is he if he doesn't? but he supposes the knowledge that heine can't die might not be enough to stop badou being afraid of what he might see when heine comes home. ]


I guess that's probably what Nails wants. For me to... choose to let him know. [ heine moves a little to the other edge of the door, putting his weight into it to help the hinges shift and creak into place. ] Back home we work separately as often as we work together, but... it's not the same here, huh?
fussiest: (pic#16494291)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-11-05 04:39 am (UTC)(link)
[ between the two of them, the door flattens itself. kaveh considers its angle. he takes out a bubble level to double-check the margin of error they are working with, and then, considering it acceptable, motions for heine to stand so that they can lift the door together. ]

I wouldn't be able to guess at Badou's true thoughts - we are separate people, after all. But if I were him, I'd think so. What you choose sometimes doesn't matter as much as the act of making that choice itself. Or so I've learned, anyway. [ though, kaveh supposes - that is only something one can say to make yourself feel better for having known that the choices you had were between bitter and bitter. because in those scenarios, isn't it the fact that you chose, anyway, that truly mattered in the end?

alhaitham would argue bitterly against the notion of a choice that means so little. but kaveh is the one who has had to live out the consequences of it.
]

But I've been thinking of that question myself, Heine. What makes this place different? I think it's in part the fact that we've ventured into the unknown. If this were in Sumeru City, I'd argue that I'd also have quite a few blind spots as to what Teyvat is capable of throwing at us, but I'd at least know the extent of the danger and know the resources and recourse available to mitigate it. I hate feeling so powerless. But this place brings it out of me. That is a major difference between being back home and being here, I think.

[ hm. ]

Here's another perspective: that when two people enter the unknown together, there's an unspoken social contract to explore that unknown together. Isn't it so, that we are now in a context forced to rely on others in a way we have never done so before?
kampfgeist: (sigh | what a headache)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-11-07 05:01 am (UTC)(link)
Wow, you don't say. [ is heine's gentle deadpan at that, we are separate people, after all. it's accompanied by a faint smile, so at least kaveh should know he means it affectionately.

it's never as often as in conversation with kaveh that heine feels his own lack of education so acutely, because this is considerably more philosophy than he's used to working through in his own mind. but he thinks he gets it, he thinks he more or less agrees. that the outcome doesn't matter as much as the act of looping someone else into the decision, as having chosen to include them instead of informing them after the fact. ]


Yeah, that's true. [ he hoists the metal a little higher, propping it atop one boot so kaveh can direct him where to put it. ] I don't know. I think he and I think of it differently. I was going first because whatever it is, it can't hurt me [ or, it can hurt him terribly but can't kill him, which is more or less the same thing ] and he doesn't want me to be... shouldering that alone, I guess.

[ heine shrugs slightly. ] But not anymore. He asked, so.
fussiest: (pic#16494293)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-11-09 07:41 am (UTC)(link)
[ heine's deadpan rings. kaveh grins at it. heine lifts the door with the ease and grace of a man used to more, and kaveh adjusts their angle so that they line the door up with the hinges. there's a bit of warping to the metal. it doesn't match up entirely. so kaveh takes out his hammer, and, indicating that heine should hold himself still, begins to hammer out the dents.

the sound rings. it echoes like the knell of a thousand bells. kaveh only speaks again when the sound has died:
]

I'm glad. [ kaveh says, ] I'm glad that he asked, and I'm glad that you listened.

[ kaveh looks to heine. there had been broken knuckles against the wall. there had been a lollipop slipped between his fingers. this city put heine at odds everywhere. heine was always the first to offer his strength. it clicks into place. kaveh's expression is stricken. ]

But Heine, that's wrong. It isn't that it can't hurt you. It's that it can't kill you. It hurts you all the same, and nothing erases that pain.
kampfgeist: (thinking | up to no good)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-11-10 06:49 pm (UTC)(link)
[ the experience of holding a piece of metal while someone else hammers it is... interesting, and heine feels the reverberations all the way to his toes, but he keeps his grip on the door until kaveh is done with his fine-tuning. ]

Jeez, that's loud. [ it's more a surprised observation than a complaint, though. not loud enough to hurt heine's ears, just... somehow loud throughout his entire body. he lifts the door again to see if it'll fit better this time and is pleased to find that it does. maybe heine will avoid jail today after all.

he will not, however, avoid kaveh's callout post. to have it pointed out that finely makes him squirm, albeit not in a bad way. ]


Well—yeah. [ he can't argue that. it does hurt, every single time. ] But I have a good pain tolerance?

[ honestly, even heine doesn't sound very convincing, saying that. he knows kaveh's not going to accept that as an excuse. ]
fussiest: (pic#16494298)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-11-17 11:05 am (UTC)(link)
[ kaveh looks. heine must know, that the words he utters do himself no justice. it's in the slight uncertainty of his voice, the way he looks at kaveh. at what point, kaveh suddenly thinks, is he imposing his beliefs on heine in a way that does heine no justice? if heine needs to look to kaveh for permission to say such a thing about himself. and then, the part of kaveh that is like a burning, unbearable sun, the part of him that has always broken reality to fit his image of it: good. kaveh thinks, good. if it can force heine to think twice, even for a split second, kaveh will be unbearable. kaveh will be unfair.

kaveh put the door to the proper slot. he begins to reslot the hinges in.
]

It hurts me to know that you've been hurt that way. It hurts likely more than you know. [ kaveh twists the metal in place with his wrench. it holds. ] But not just me. I'm sure it hurts Badou and Nill as well. How can you treat our Heine so roughly? Of course I'm going to scold you for it.
kampfgeist: (thinking | forgot to shade this one)

[personal profile] kampfgeist 2023-11-20 06:45 am (UTC)(link)
[ heine braces himself more firmly against the shape of the door, using the change in position as an excuse not to meet kaveh's eyes. of course he's right. if it were heine in badou's position he would be furious. it's a wonder that badou really hasn't put his head through any walls yet. ]

I know—I know. I just... [ he pauses to let kaveh wrench another piece of a metal into shape. the door is getting close to being able to hang under its own weight, heine thinks. ] I've never... been worth more than that.

[ that part, he says quietly. it's the briefest of glimpses into the vast ocean of heine's shame. ]

I know it's hard to understand. [ most people won't, ever. for that heine is grateful—the fact of his existence is a burden he's glad to shoulder alone. ] I was made so that my body could be a weapon. A shield. That's all I've ever known how to be. It's—it's new to me, having people who want me to be more.
fussiest: (pic#16494286)

[personal profile] fussiest 2023-11-23 10:23 am (UTC)(link)
[ it clicks, kaveh thinks. it does, though in the knell of a click resounding in an empty vault, the click of a shut door, the click of a coffin's lid. that kaveh resonates with it is no comfort - it is, after all, the understanding that you are lesser, that you ought to be lesser, that you've put yourself into a small box that you've drawn for yourself and convinced yourself that the line in the sand is impassable.

that heine thinks so fills kaveh with contempt for the one who put heine there and taught him so.
]

I think the people around you not only want you to be more, but want you to want yourself to be more. [ is what kaveh says, quietly. ] Both for their sake, and for your own.

[ the door hinges into place. kaveh tests its heft, and then, gesturing for heine to let go, swings it back and forth. it creaks, its hinges not quite factory aligned, but the door holds.

kaveh smiles. he takes out a smaller hammer.
] You are worth more. If you alone asserting it has caused you to believe so, then I alone asserting it ought to counteract that. Therefore, you have objective value; though letting yourself believe that - that can be the hardest thing in the world. Isn't it funny? We can believe in things like the sun will rise every single day without any proof aside from having seen it rise the previous day, but we can hardly believe something about ourselves.