kampfgeist: (frown | memories all alone in the moo)
ʜᴇɪɴᴇ "babygirl (affectionate)" ʀᴀᴍᴍꜱᴛᴇɪɴᴇʀ ([personal profile] kampfgeist) wrote in [community profile] citylogs 2023-11-05 08:34 am (UTC)

Kaveh— [ what is he to do with this? what is heine to do with the weight of what it means to him that the thought of heine's death could bring kaveh to tears? kaveh, who is brilliance embodied, who is color and light and kindness and wit, who is one of heine's closest friends and one of the people heine is most afraid of hurting?

maybe only this: kaveh is leaning forward anyway, so heine lets go of his ankle and reaches to hold him instead. ]


I'm beginning to learn. [ he rests his cheek against the top of kaveh's head, because this embrace is as much for heine as it is for kaveh. he has spent most of his adult life refusing this sort of physical reassurance as a small kindness he doesn't deserve, but little by little heine has started to realize that he doesn't need to deny himself everything that makes life worth living.

so he allows himself this much, his arms around kaveh's shoulders, his cheek on kaveh's hair. ]
I think—I think I'm starting to believe that.

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