laidtocrest: (pic#15762076)
Sylvain Jose Gautier ([personal profile] laidtocrest) wrote in [community profile] citylogs 2023-08-11 02:40 pm (UTC)

I do too this is horrible but also great

[Under different circumstances, Sylvain would have tried for some flattery, some flirting, maybe? Mild flirting not meant to go anywhere so much as meant to deflect. Something about how he can't be doing that badly if he's got someone kind like her worrying about him, a woman attractive in a warrior who could possibly disembowel him sort of way. People tended to not ask the person smiling casually if they're in the middle of an existential crisis, and women tended to assume the guy hitting on them is doing okay.

He wanted to do that. He couldn't. For one, Sylvain knows looks like shit, probably, and probably doesn't want to look in a mirror.]


I don't know.

[For another, his voice is trembling too much to really pull off...well, most anything, and his emotional reserves are low, and he feels naked and exposed like he has to do a sprint of shame and the girl kept his pants, and...

So, with a sigh, Sylvain slowly gets out of the...metal thing.]


I guess it's just everything that's getting to me. I thought I was doing okay, and then it just all came crashing down when I was alone with some ice cream.

[Sylvain's yet to make the connection, he's just too distraught, he's looks in one of the mirrors and isn't sure if he's glad that there's no piggish chocolate mess around his mouth, or upset that he's hit a point in his life in which he has to think, "Well, I'm sure glad there's no piggish chocolate mess around my mouth 'cause that definitely could've happened!" Or both? A mix of both.

See? He didn't want to look in a mirror, but he did, and it just makes everything all the more worse.]


I miss...nature. [He misses a lot of things but they're starting there.]

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